Hosting/Attending Parties

Maintaining open lines of communication is the single most important thing you can do to prevent your teen from using alcohol and other drugs. But it isn’t enough! Research shows that parents have a powerful voice in their teen’s lives and decisions. Teens who say their parents strongly disapprove of underage drinking are less likely to use alcohol.

When your teen throws a party
Did you know
Going out of town
Know the facts...before you send your teen out to party
When your teen is a guest at a party
Stay active and involved
Curfews

1. Decide on a guest list. Give your teen a maximum number to invite and set an age limit for guests.
2. Send invitations and have your teen inform his/her gusts that the party is by invitation only.
3. Set a party time, inclusive of a start and end time.
4. Inform parents/guardians about the party and explain your expectations of partygoers. No alcohol!
5. Stay at the party. Your presence is important. Walk through the party area frequently.
6. If you suspect a teen guest is intoxicated, contact his or her parents.guardians immediately.
7. Have guests remain in the party location; do not allow teens to go back and forth to a parking lot or their car.
8. Watch for strange behavior. Pay attention if a guest frequents the bathroom after getting a drink. This could indicate the use of illegal substances or alcohol.

• Of the 20 million junior and senior high school students in America, half drink once a month (MADD, 2002)
• 33 % of nearly 200,000 students nationally surveyed said that their parents often do not set clear rules. (MADD, 2002)
• The average age when a teen tries alcohol for the first time is age 11. (NIAAA, 2002)
• Two-thirds of teens that start drinking by age 15 will end up trying illegal drugs. (NIAAA, 2002)
• Although a majority of parents believe peer pressure to be a primary reason teens drink or use drugs, teens say:
  79% - being drunk/high feels good
  67% - helps to forget problems
  66% others do it (peer pressure)
  47% - nothing else to do
• 2.6 million teenagers did not know you could die from an overdose of alcohol. (MADD, 2002)
• 56% of students in grades 5 to 12 say that alcohol advertising encourages them to drink. (MADD, 2002)

Before you go out of town and leave a teen alone or in charge, consider the following:

• Can your teen handle the responsibility?
• Make it clear that throwing a party is not an option!
• Ask a trusted adult such as a close neighbor to check on your teen and your home while you are gone.
• Be clear about consequences (in advance) if your teen chooses to have a party while you are gone.

If you are a parent of a high school student, soon your teen will be experiencing three of the most anticipated events in his or her life; spring break, prom and graduation. Most teens will celebrate by attending with their friends. Before you send your teen out to celebrate, be prepared for what they may encounter before they return to the safety and comfort of your home.

• Before giving consent to your teen to attend, call the adult host to confirm party location, time and whether alcohol is being served
• If you do not know the host parent or on-site designated adult, take the time to introduce yourself. Get to know the parents of your teen’s friends. Make sure they share your expectations of drug and alcohol-free parties.
• Confirm that no alcohol will be served and adult supervision will be on-site. Make sure that the parent is trustworthy. It is unfortunate, but not all parents/guardians can be trusted with your teen’s safety and well-being.
• Discuss drop-off and pickup expectations with your teen. Make sure your teen has money or a cell phone for an emergency call.
• Make it easy for your teen to leave a party if there are drugs/alcohol. Make arrangements for them to call you or another trusted adult if they need to be picked up. Emphasize they should never ride home with any driver who has been drinking.
• Discuss with your teen the dangers of drinking and driving or riding in a car with an impaired person. Even though alcohol is not supposed to be served at the party, there is no guarantee that a party guest will not try to sneak alcohol in.
• Stay up and greet your teen when they return home. This lets your teen know you care and are paying attention to what they are doing.
• Be clear about consequences (in advance) if your teen chooses to drink alcohol.

• Know your teens friends and favorite hangouts
• Know the parents/guardians of your teens’ friends
• Keep track of and support your teens’ participation in school and community activities
• Do not allow any unchaperoned parties or other gatherings in your home
• If you keep alcohol in your home, keep track of the supply

The following curfews are recommended for Friday and Saturday nights for parties, dates and other planned activities.

• 7th Grade – 10:00 p.m.
• 8th Grade – 10:30 p.m.
• 9th Grade – 11:00 p.m.
• 10th Grade – 11:30 p.m.
• 11th Grade – 12:00 a.m.
• 12th Grade – 12:00 a.m.

Adapted from Parental Guide to Hosting Responsible Teen Parties , the Virginia Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control (ABC).